Trusting Women Again

Have you heard a woman say something like "I'm just not good at making friends with women" or anything even remotely like it? I have. I've also said it. More times than I care to reflect on. It wasn't until I read this blog post by Jaime at I Am Not The Babysitter this morning, that I realized I should think on WHY I feel this way and WHY I feel I need to say things like that.

I'm studying and working to become a doula and lactation consultant, someone who supports and empowers women, so shouldn't I be examining my own relationships with women and why they are weak or I perceive them as weak? I started thinking that if I am actually going to be a good support person, asking other mothers and women to put their trust in me, I should be able to put trust in them as well, I can't ask for something I'm not willing to give. I'm constantly asking women to trust their own bodies and support systems, a support system that I want to be a part of. I'm constantly saying "why don't doctors and medical professionals TRUST women (and their instincts, intuitions, abilities, etc.)?" But I myself don't trust women nearly enough. How can I make a true difference if I don't find the root of the issue and put my mind to setting things right?

I've been hurt by a lot of women in my life, and I'm sure I have blame to share in hurting other women. I don't like how ugly things can get, and how long those scars can last. Once I read that article this morning, I started examining my relationships with other women more closely. I've been making and maintaining stronger relationships with women, realizing the value of their friendship, and working hard (as one should in any relationship) to keep the relationship alive and fruitful. It's something I'll have to work hard to correct, the tendency to reject female companionship and femininity in an effort to protect and prove myself, but it's worth doing.